Offended? Few things offend me. My anger rears its ugly head when someone disrespects our elders; as I watch inconsiderate cell-dweebs on the road, or at a counter expecting fast service; and listening to arguments in which one person, driven solely by emotion, has no basis for his opinion. There are a handful of things that bring my ire to the surface, affront me, or that I resent; whether or not someone pays for my dinner isn’t among them.
My husband and I are blessed with visitors from time to time. Some are relatives. Some are not. Before each visit, we discuss any excursions, or activities. If we venture out for the “wastes and tastes” of our town, it’s because we have the funds to do so. If not, we entertain at home, and prepare meals that surpass the quality of most restaurants -- all made by my better-than-the-average-chef spouse. One of the determinants, however, is not our friend’s or family member’s earning potential, or stroke of monetary luck; winning the lottery, inheriting a family fortune, or finding gold in the Adirondack Mountains (yes, this is sarcasm). In other words, how much money he, she, or them possess makes no difference to us.
One of our visitors may offer to take us out to dinner, and that’s okay. We aren’t expecting it, though. That anyone does is rather disconcerting.
I asked a few people, which I see on a weekly basis, how they’d react in a similar situation. Andrew Browning’s sister’s finances exceed his own, yet, he finds it rather disturbing that someone assumes she should pay more, or end up with the bill, because of it. Taylor Price has a younger brother who, in all likelihood, will someday make more money. These extra green-backs won’t change his paying for a night out on the town. It may, on occasion, have them enjoying each other’s company in a simpler setting. That’s a good thing. Isn’t it? In my humble opinion, more memorable moments are made from less expenditure, not costly settings. To prove my point, I invite the reader to think back to the fondest of memories.
Continuing…Jeremy Vester and Neil Franklin are both more financially-set than their siblings. Hence, they haven’t experienced Unequal’s situation. Neither, however, becomes offended if a wealthier guest foregoes paying for dinner during an extended stay.
Then, there’s Karen Ankner who responded to my posting the previous blog on our Facebook page:
“It is pretty telling that he referred to himself as ‘Unequal.’ He needs to let go of whatever resentment he has toward his sister. I don’t think it has much to do with whether or not she bought him a meal. I agree that the advice was really bad too I never read [Dear] Abby anymore, but whoever took over is not very good if this is a typical example. I stick to Dan Savage for sheer entertainment and shock value. People ask that guy some crazy shit and his answers are great.”
So, with my faith in humanity somewhat restored, I end this post. There are others who think as I think: who know the true meaning of hospitality, who know that generosity is not withheld due to monetary gain, and who know how to truly be a host.
Now, how to tackle rudeness toward our elderly; cell-phone freaks who air their dirty laundry within earshot, block the grocery store aisle, and lengthen our wait at many a traffic light; and the un-neighborly neighbors just to name few.
Stay tuned…
Since I am not a writer, I'm thankful you can use
your skills to voice exactly how I also feel. I no longer have the financial means to host my guests the way I did in the past. But that will not stop me. It will be simpler and likely to be spent in my home. I've always preferred more intimate settings anyway. I also would not expect anything in return. Unequal and Dear Abby, just don't get it. They are truly missing out on having true and meaningful connections with those that matter the most. Bring on the other topics, especially rudeness to our elderly. Hate seeing that.
Posted by: Lisa Dionne | June 01, 2015 at 07:03 PM
I agree with every last word, Maggie, and look forward to your future rants on the upcoming subjects. We definitely have some similar pet peeves. Maybe we can figure out why some people seem to lack the simplest of courtesies, things that most people find to have ingrained like second nature. Maybe that's it. Nature. Take apples, for instance. I love apples. But, if you have ever picked them, there are a couple on every tree....
Posted by: Michael Armstrong | June 01, 2015 at 06:21 PM