Are sex and love two human frailties that cannot be mastered or conquered? I believe the answer is "yes." If we convince ourselves otherwise, we may find our lives full of nothing but disenchantment and frustration.
Long before Shakespeare wrote Romeo and Juliet, people confronted the humanness of carnal and romantic attraction. Both are as old as the species itself.
Couples may think they have unique situations; but the truth is that someone, somewhere, had/has/will have comparable and even worse quandaries and shortcomings when their lives involve the mysteries of love and sex. Hell, there's also better and best. Don't forget those.
I couldn't help but wonder, however -- when I received the following comment from a young man who'd read my last relationship post -- if we heed too much of the incorrect and immoral information and not enough of the proper instruction on both: "I read [your] three articles. They seem basically sound, however, one thing stuck in my mind regarding context. The commercialization of Sex and Love has made it a hall of ugly mirrors that we have to get through somehow."
I enjoyed the phrase "a hall of ugly mirrors" so much; it compelled me to begin another series entitled Sex and Love. I couldn't allow the opportunity to discuss the commercialization of anything pass me by.
Upon reading the young man's remark, I thought of the medieval image of an angel perched on one shoulder and a devil on the other. This parallel to the human condition is in numerous writings. It was even utilized for commercials at one time.
Put simply, each of us has the capacity for good or evil. Whichever we nurture dominates and becomes habit. Unfortunately, though, an overwhelming amount of corrupt and improper behavior lights up movie and television screens and fills the pages of books, magazines, and newspapers. And it saddens me to say that even radio jumped on the propaganda bandwagon decades ago.
So when we mimic the latest sitcom scenario in real life or emulate the newest romance novel, do we really expect life to imitate art? Perhaps as children or young adults, we did. Common sense, however, should kick in as we begin our walk through the mirrored hall called adulthood.
Believe me; I've seen quite a few ugly images staring back at me from those funhouse mirrors. And they frightened me to the brink of insanity on a few occasions. Admittedly, my life was one hard lesson after another. This did not in the least deter me from becoming the person I wanted to be or living on my own terms. There are numerous reasons for my being who I am and where I am today: Living a simple existence; with someone I admire, respect, and love; and more content than I ever dreamed possible.
Most importantly, I didn't succumb to peer pressure or propaganda. I had a solid foundation to work with and an inexhaustible supply of support. Moreover; although I haven't always thought so, I know that I've been blessed beyond measure.
Follow me, then, down this hall of ugly mirrors that we must all travel. Allow me to light some of the way with brutal honesty and hard-earned morality. Understand that I am no saint. It took me a long time to find my way out. Hopefully, though, my insight will ease the reflections of inability and failure.
Email Maggie at maggietwest@aim.com
Really enjoyed this.
People definitely emulate movies, and TV especially when it comes to their views on sex and love. I think it's hard not to think the way things are portrayed is right if you haven't experienced anything like love of sex. But hopefully, kids especially, have good role models such as their parents to tell them about those things and show them what love is/means.
I'm rambling so I'll stop. :)
Posted by: Ashley Long | October 27, 2011 at 06:35 AM